She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Acid is not a monday night drug
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
