Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
