Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
operation harelip BJ is a go
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize