whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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