You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
