Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
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