its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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