Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
