I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
