So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
sex in a hospital.. check
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Randomize
