i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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