At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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