i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
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