i jhust puked up my retainher.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
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