i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
