Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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