we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
pray to the hookup gods
Randomize