You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
