Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
id be glad to
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
