i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
