She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize