Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Randomize
