i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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