Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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