That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
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