I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
