So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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