Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
