its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize