just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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