so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
