Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
