i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
