It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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