all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
