Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Randomize