my phone needs a breathalizer
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
You've changed since you got that strap on
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