I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
operation harelip BJ is a go
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
