Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I can't turn off my feet"
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize