no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
