Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
