You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Randomize
