you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
