he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
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