My friends, they love my intelligence
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
