Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
