we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
