Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
