yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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