i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
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