i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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